


Alone

by SoDoRoses (FairyChess)



Series: LAOFT Extras [29]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Abandonment Issues, Attachment Issues, Gen, Logan Roman and Patton are here but only in a dream, Nightmares, virgil sense of boundaries in not outright BadTM but its definitely not great
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 14:00:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19831699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FairyChess/pseuds/SoDoRoses
Summary: “All by myself I have to go,with none to tell me what to do-All alone beside the streams,and up the mountain-sides of dreams,”-Robert Louis Stevenson, The Land Of Nod





	Alone

**Author's Note:**

> a prompt from a nonnie on tumblr:
> 
> "Does Virgil have attachment issues? Because I bet being asleep for 100 years sure made him desperate for attention or afraid his new boyfriends might leave him"
> 
> you were probably looking for LAMP! apologies. the platonic relationships keep hijacking my verse

_He couldn’t move._

_Which was familiar, but his eyes were open, which wasn’t. Neither was the fact that he wasn’t alone._

_Roman and Logan were laying on either side of him, and Patton was curled up on top of Virgil’s chest. It was comfortable, one of his favorite ways to sleep – or it would be, if he could_ move.

_Patton shuffled up Virgil’s chest, kissing him softly._

“ _I love you,” he said._

I love you, too, _Virgil thought, but his mouth wouldn’t_ _cooperate._

_Patton rolled off of him then, clamoring around Logan, who leaned in and kissed Virgil’s cheek._

“ _I love you as well, my dear,”_

_But they were both climbing off the_ _bed, and Virgil couldn’t reach for them or call out._

_R_ _oman didn’t say anything, but he did_ _sit up on one elbow and smile down at Virgil, kissing his temple before rolling off._

_Virgil couldn’t turn his head, but he could hear them walking away, too quickly, they were too far away, they needed to come back but he couldn’t call out for them, why were they leaving, come back, come back-_

_Don’t leave, please, please don’t leave, come back, I love you, don’t leave me, PLEASE-_

Virgil wrenched himself awake, already scrambling across the bed, reaching for Patton’s warmth next to him but-

Nothing. The bed was empty, the space next to him cold and untouched.

“ _ **Pat?**_ _ **PATTON?**_ _”_

Where was he? It was a dream, it was just a dream, but Vigil was awake now and Patton _wasn’t here-_

Blindly, Virgil reached into the moon-cast shadow falling across the bed, pulling it around him.

Hot, it was too hot, why was Logan’s room so hot? Virgil grabbed at the sheets of his bed, but it was perfectly made, just as untouched as Patton’s side of Virgil’s, they were _gone_ , where were they, _where were they-_

Virgil screamed in frustration, his chest tight and the air bubbling with darkness around him, and he couldn’t think, he needed to do _something_ but he had no idea what – they were gone and he was all alone, he _needed_ them-

The room flooded with light, and Virgil turned on his heel, already snarling.

Dot Sanders blinked at him, wearing a long nightgown and a house coat. She’d recoiled when he turned on her, but she didn’t retreat – her hand was still on the light switch.

“ _ **Where are they?**_ ” Virgil demanded.

Dot raised her hands in a placating gesture.

“They went camping,” she said slowly, “Remember?”

Camping. Camping – that was prickling something in the back of Virgil’s head.

“All the boys, with Matt and Larry,” she continued, still even-toned, “You didn’t want to leave the court. You told them to go without you. Do you remember?”

“ **Where** \- where-”

“Near Athens,” she said, “I don’t think you can make it quite there, Virgil, and I don’t know exactly where,”

It was flickering past his eyes when he blinked now, the memories – he’d helped Patton’s father pack the car. Roman, Logan, and Patton had all kissed him goodbye. They’d asked, over and over if he wanted to come, or wanted them to stay.

Mortified heat was crawling up Virgil’s neck. He swallowed, looking away.

“Do you remember?” she repeated.

“Yes,” he said tightly. He lowered his head, a little shamefaced.

“I apologize for breaking into your home,” he said tonelessly.

“Oh, never mind that, Roman breaks in and Logan and Thomas break _out_ about once a week. Are you _okay?_ ”

“I can leave,” said Virgil, not even bothering to try and talk his way out of that, “I shouldn’t have-”

“ _Verge_ ,” she said pointedly, “If there’s an emergency that made you come looking for Logan, I’d like to know about it, please,”

The silence of the room was too tense and too thick and too hot – Virgil pulled a little at the cuff of his sleeve.

“There’s no emergency,” he said quietly.

Dot’s eyes narrowed, scrutinizing.

“… Verge,” she said, “Did you… did you have a bad dream?”

He scowled at the floor and didn’t answer.

“ _Oh_ , dear,” she muttered, “Well, that’s a whole other thing. Come on now, this way,”

Virgil’s face wrinkled in confusion, but Dot didn’t seem to feel like she had to wait for a response. She turned around in the doorway and started down the steps.

Virgil could just leave. There was nothing stopping him, and he could make up for the home invasion at a later date, when he didn’t feel shaky and wan and like he might cry like a child any moment.

He followed.

She was already in the kitchen, and removing a steaming mug from the… what was the damn thing called – the little cupboard that made things hot.

He wasn’t awake enough for this.

“You might not like it,” she said, crossing into the living room to set it on the coffee table, “It’s lavender, but it’s Logan’s favorite. I didn’t put it in too long, I hope its not too hot,”

He sat on the couch and sipped at the tea, but he actually _didn’t_ like it – it was uncomfortably floral, though not enough to bring up more than the faintest twinge of bad memories. He took a second, polite sip of it and then set it down.

He must have been far more out of it than he thought, because the next thing he knew Dot had come to stand beside him and placed one gentle, warm hand on his head.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” he said immediately.

She hummed.

“Alright,” she said softly, pushing some of his hair back, and Virgil felt an uncomfortable lump rise in his throat.

“Tell you what,” she said, “Why don’t you sleep here?”

Virgil gave her a baffled look.

“My room’s right down that hallway,” Dot said, pointing, and Virgil saw the light of a dim lamp shining through the gap of the door. “So if you have another bad dream, I’ll be right here,”

“I don’t need to be babysat,” said Virgil, a little sharper than he meant to.

“I know,” she said, “You don’t have to stay. But it I think it would make us both feel better,”

Virgil gave her a suspicious look.

“Logan and Thomas do need a little time without their momma hovering over their shoulders,” she said conspiratorially, “But that does _not_ mean I have to like it,”

Virgil snorted.

Dot smiled at him, and leaned up to give him a wholly unnecessary but not necessarily unwelcome kiss on the temple.

“Goodnight, Verge,” she said.

“Goodnight, ma’am,” he murmured. She pushed his hair back one more time before trotting back to her bedroom.

Virgil pulled the throw blanket off the back of the couch, but he didn’t lay down – just wrapped it around his shoulders and watched the shadow of Dot’s feet move under the gap of her doorway.

He didn’t go back to sleep – wouldn’t sleep again, not until the other three returned and he could crash between them in a tangle of limbs.

But he didn’t leave, either.

**Author's Note:**

> i am also [ tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors ](tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors.tumblr.com) over on tumblr! I'm about twenty prompts back up atm but LAOFT is basically a drug for me at this point so feel free to enable me


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